Creating New Christmas Traditions
- 3 minsFor the first time in many years, I am looking forward to celebrating Christmas. I decided to create new traditions that focus on joy and gratitude.
Christmas as a Child
Christmas has always been special for me and my family. I have the fondest memories of helping my mom cook, waiting for my cousins to arrive (I would check the front window every 10 minutes 😂), and setting up the model train with my grandfather. When I got old enough, I was trusted to pick which record to play while opened presents around the tree. Often, I chose either The Jackson’s or Nat King Cole. In the evenings on Christmas, we would watch sports or classic Christmas movies like “Frosty the Snowman” or “Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer.”
As a child, I was always beyond excited. I just knew I could hear Santa on the roof 😂. I believed in Santa much longer than most kids, probably because my mom always encouraged the magic of Christmas. My grandfather also was a big part of that magic, and he documented every Christmas with tons of photos.
One of my most memorable Christmases was when I received a telescope. My mom knew me better than anyone (I didn’t even ask for it), and she always wanted to encourage my love of science and exploration. Christmas was never about what I received, but about the joy of being with family and giving thoughtful gifts to others. I feel lucky to have experienced such magical Christmases as a child.
Christmas as an Adult
Christmas lost a bit of its shine for me after I lost my grandfather in 2011, and when my mom became sick in 2020, it became even harder. My last few Christmases have been filled with standing outside of a nursing home window to visit my mom (because of Covid restrictions in 2020), sitting beside my mom while she was on a ventilator in 2021, and then grieving her loss in 2022 (I was lucky enough to spend Christmas 2022 with a close friend).
I avoided spending Christmas with anyone in 2023 or 2024. In many ways, I regret not visiting my aunt in Mississippi, even though grad school (and the lack of finances it provides) made it difficult to travel. I don’t think anyone really thought about me those Christmases other than my family. It’s a reality that as we age (especially if we are single), the holidays require embracing solitude. After all, in our country, Christmas is often viewed as a family holiday - not a friends or individual holiday. For me, I expect to spend mmany more Christmases alone (even though I don’t want to), and I need to learn to be okay with that.
Creating New Traditions
This year, I decided to reclaim Christmas as a day of joy. Who knows how many christmases I have left? Maybe 20 at best or 30 if I’m lucky.
I want to make the most of every day of my life, so this Christmas I have adopted new traditions that include writing a letter to my future self (that I will open next Christmas), honoring my family and those I’ve lost, connecting with my family over Zoom, starting the morning with my favorite Christmas movies like A Charlie Brown Christmas, Rudolph, The Preacher’s Wife, and The Wizard of Oz, cooking a big meal for myself, and spending the rest of the day creating, resting, laughing, and sharing simple joy with people I care about.
Also, I planned a “Brunchmas” (Christmas Brunch) with friends last week, and it was great to spend time with the people I’m closest to in Birmingham. I hope for that to become a recurring tradition even if I’m not in Birmingham next year.
We deserve for the holidays to feel magical even as adults. This Christmas, I choose magic, joy, gratitude, and love, and I hope you do the same. Merry Christmas! 🎄
Shaurita D. Hutchins
PhD Candidate